friend shared a pic from Clickhole that said
“This balloon represents you
for some reason.”
I said something about the higher pressure on the inside causing it to pop and four people liked it. I’m pretty sure this was my first Facebook interaction in weeks. My friend in the room with me laughed, then said, “I liked the thing you posted on that facebook picture.” It was the stupidest thing ever.
I said to my friend, “I’m serious. Literally.” I will literally pop. “Literally. I actually mean that.” Literally, I will pop. I will pop, and it will be a literal one. Because, oh yeah, the balloon was filled with helium; it was a helium balloon if that sort of thing matters to you, and it was going up into the sky.
I hate when people misuse the word “literally.” It is just one of the most absurd things to misuse, most of the time. People who just use it in place of “really” or “very” aren’t that bad, most of the time. It was literally the first day. Ok. I wouldn’t have assumed that had any meaning other than the literal one. In fact, that has no real meaning at all outside of the literal one. If it was only figuratively the first day, you probably shouldn’t have phrased it that way. Or maybe you can literally turn your life around. That’s freaky.