Is it karma why i’m leaving here with a broken heart? Why do i continue to want men simply because i cannot have them? This is not fair. I hate this. It is not my fault he feels the way he does. It is not my fault people fall in love with me so i don’t want to suffer because i don’t feel the same. I can’t tell when last i’ve felt the same. I’ve never kissed someone passionately until I met you. That’s the first time i felt all those lovely things and not feel emotionally claustrophobic from a kiss. I wanted him so badly. He has wanted me for years now because i’m giving him attention finally he is distancing himself. At the sight of me he used to drop everything and scurry to be near me. Cant even contain himself when he is near me. I don’t know what happened. Its not like i slept with him. I am so infatuated with him. I know only time will heal my heart. And everyone’s heart. And the 3-5 guys who are in pain because of me. It is not my fault but i am sorry. I’m sorry they are hurting and i’m sorry they have to g o through this because i know exactly how heavy hearted and crappy they feel.