Last night I had a dream about you. It wasn’t sweet and lovely like my other dreams have been. It was honest and crushing. I was desperately trying to be what you wanted; trying to be a part of your life again. I wanted your tender affection. I wanted that look in your eyes, that embrace of your arms. I wanted everything to feel normal again. But nothing was.
It’s been six months since we have spoken and I think about you everyday. Why can’t I give you up? Even when you are so bad for me. Why do I keep picking you up again, like an addict coming back for more? I need a solution. I can’t change you, but I want to make you like me because I think I’m worth liking. But I can’t get near you. The flame of your essence burns my nerves raw and leaves me boiling with fear and self hatred. Stay away!! Stay away, is the only thing my brain can scream out.