• Body

    by  • July 26, 2014 • * Safe for Work *, Fear • 3 Comments

    I HATE MY BODY. I HATE MYSELF. I JUST WANT TO BE SKINNY. TINY. I’VE RUINED IT.

    128 lbs.

    That’s all I can think.

    128 lbs.

    I was 120 a month ago, but I ruined it. COMPLETELY RUINED IT.

    128 lbs.

    I’m sick. I know it. I just tried to make myself vomit for over an hour to get those goddamn calories out of my body. But I couldn’t do it. MY BODY WOULDN’T DO IT.

    WHY NOT? PLENTY OF OTHER PEOPLE CAN, BUT WHY CAN’T I? WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? I CAN’T STOP EATING. I NEED TO STOP EATING. WHY CAN’T I CONTROL MYSELF ANYMORE? I USED TO BE SO GOOD AT IT.

    128 lbs.

    TOMORROW: Coffee, black. Then another coffee, black. I can do this. I can master my urges. I AM IN CONTROL.

    128 lbs.

    3 Responses to Body

    1. jucing blasted my fat away
      July 26, 2014 at 7:16 am

      Try juicing A mean green juice 3-6 juices a day loses weight very fast up to 20lb in two weeks.. Watch the film fat sick and nearly dead he does 60 days on nothing but home made juice..it inspires! dont be bulimic because that causes stomach acids and can rot your stomach, go buy yourself a juicer and start juicing u get all the nutrients without the bad saturated fats its very healthy.
      FROM EXPERIENCE.

    2. listen to jucing
      July 26, 2014 at 11:21 am

      and add sports

    3. Jacqueline
      July 28, 2014 at 11:28 am

      Don’t hate yourself
      it is just a number
      you are beautiful, and if you cant control your urges, maybe your body just is trying to tell you something.
      I’ve been through this. hell, im still going through it. Every day is a battle. If you starve tomorrow, you make food forbidden, and your body will just crave it more. Eat, and eat healthy, eat what you know will make you feel strong and good.
      I know this has been a rough month, but its just a month
      Start over tomorrow, not with a restrictive diet, but with a respect for yourself as a person. Start there, and then bring back the exercise and the calorie counting.
      I really wish you luck,
      remember that it will all be okay.

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