• Not mine.

    by  • July 17, 2014 • * Safe for Work *, Heartbreak • 0 Comments

    I understand I messed up. You offered to give me something greater and I didn’t take it. It could’ve been you and me but instead I so blindly went in another direction. By the time I started to realize my mistake it was too late. Now it’s you and her. It hurts to look af you two together. It hurts to know all the things you give her are the things you wanted to give to me. I hate myself for making such a dumb decision. I also regret continuing to see you. You’re not mine to see. I used to feel some type of satisfaction whenever you’d come my way. I figured “well they can’t be all that happy if he still comes to me”…. But every time one of our visits would end I no longer felt that satisfaction. Every time you leave to go back and be in her arms I feel empty again. I feel empty because I know that those are the arms you belong in. I feel empty because I should want better for myself than to be your little secret while she’s away…. Because one of these days you’ll toss me aside. Things like this don’t last and I shouldn’t want it to last. I can’t keep holding onto what used to be. I know once upon a time you wanted to be with me. You’re with her now, you’re not mine to want to be with.
    I just need to be okay with the fact you’re not mine.
    You are not mine.

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