• I don’t know if I can do this any more

    by  • July 11, 2014 • * Safe for Work *, Dating • 0 Comments

    I don’t know if my relationship is working any more. I feel like I’m losing a part of myself every time we fight, every time we try to plan a future that just seems foggy. I want it, I want it so bad, but I don’t know if I want it if I don’t get to be me. I am independent, I am a girl who has feelings for a million things, people, whatever, I love body art and piercings, I love learning. I love her, but what if that’s not enough.
    And I know it’s being made worse by the way I feel about an old friend, a four year old crush that’s endured where one relationship and two flings have failed. It’s not some kind of unrequited love bullshit; we are friends and equals on nearly every level. I just like her a lot more than she likes me. She’s married. I’m supposed to be getting married. We can’t even figure out if she wants to move away from her family, when all I want to do is see the world. I don’t know any more. I’m finding it more and more difficult everyday.

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