• No effort

    by  • May 17, 2014 • To You • 0 Comments

    I just wanna put into perspective why I feel like complete and total shit. When was the last time you visited me at work? When was the last time you wrote me a really sweet letter, like the ones i write you? Or the ones you wrote kaitlyn? When was the last time you sent me a goodmorning text? When was the last time you drove to my house, in your truck? The way i drive to your house when i want to see you? When was the last time I was your screensaver? When was the last time you asked me to come over without me bringing it up? Whens my birthday? When was the last time you texted me first? When was the last time you really wanted to see me, but I had plans with someone else? If i put as much effort into our relationship as you do, youd be done with me in weeks. Weeks because the first week you probably would love the fact that im not blowing your shit up. The second week you might miss me a little but youd party with your friends and probably not notice. And by the third week youd probably feel the way I do right now. I spend so much time and money and effort on you and i just feel like a fucking accessory. Not a necessity. You dont talk about wanting me anymore. Or needing me. Or a future with me. And when i read your messages to Brittany they were sent the night before. At like 1-4 am. When you were ignoring me and i was worried about you. But i was like ‘no big deal. Hes out with his friend :/’ but no. You were putting more conversational effort into some random fucking bitch, than the girl who takes you in when you have no place to stay. Than the one who loves you no matter what. Than the one who remembers your birthday. Who remembers everything about you. Who spends hundreds of hours and dollars on you. Than the one who would die for you in a heartbeat. Sorry im bad at sex and not skinny and not good enough. Sorry im not brittany. Sorry im a bitch. Sorry you feel obligated to be with me. Sorry your feelings faded away.

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