• Just babbling

    by  • May 8, 2014 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 0 Comments

    Dear long lost man,
    I don’t even know what I’m doing here. I sleep late. My eyes feel very uncomfortable. I got eyelash extensions. You know I already had spider lashes. Don’t even know why I wasted two hours getting them. I just felt like I needed a pick me up. They make my eyes pop. Your favorite things on my face, I think. Anyway, life is going fine. Today I went shopping and saw mother’s day gifts. I almost started crying. I will never get used to being away from my mom. No one knows, but it kills me. It’s been just the two of us for years. She’s my everything. And I bet she feels the same way losing her mother in 2012. On new years eve. Painful. It’s sad because the night before I couldn’t stop thinking about her! I thought wow. At least granny lived to see the new year. Who knew 17 hours later she’d be gone. I have recovered from granny’s death but mom hasn’t. My father-ugh. I can’t even deal with him right now. If it wasn’t for his mild, softness toward me I wouldn’t even speak to him. I always have this soft spot for him. Almost as soft as the one I have for you. I still think about you. It’s crazy. Now I can say- it’s been years. Since I’ve seen or spoken to you. I haven’t had a crush since you. I miss that feeling. I had a little one the other day but nothing fiery and strong like the one I had for you. My love life..where do I start. Still, one sided relationships. I fear I’ll never fall in love. I won’t reciprocate anyone’s feelings and vise versa. I can’t make myself love him back. Well we’re not in the love phase yet. I just want to date but he is pressuring me to take things further. Agh. I miss you. I fear I will never see you again. I do have a plan to see you in a year or two. I assume you’ll be completely grey. That’s adorable. I will be of age. Ok Ok I know. I’ll never be ‘of age’ enough for you. I’ll be your sugar baby. Then it’d be appropriate. Hopefully by then I won’t be so shy. I am kind of growing out of it But I am still reserved. People think I am mysterious. They lean in when I open my mouth. I guess that accounts for all the personal questions. My professor thinks I’m dull. I’m just not an extrovert like his other students. Except on fridays haha. I think he thinks I’m a bimbo. Maybe because I don’t talk much in class. He hasn’t gotten any work from me yet that I assume will prove him wrong. I don’t think he likes me. Why, I couldn’t tell you. We just met. He stares at me in class, and if I take a peep out the window or at anything besides his mouth all hell breaks loose. I’ll give him my undivided attention. I don’t like him either anyway because he’s mean to me. My other prof, I think is an old horn dog. He checks out the girls all day. Pays extra special attention to me when I’m wearing those V neck shirts. Can’t wait to start my new classes. I won’t miss them. I hope to see you soon. Abrupt ending but I’m falling asleep. Goodbye. Love you.

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