• I Don’t Even Know Why….

    by  • April 30, 2014 • Miss You • 0 Comments

    You know, I told you that I was afraid you would hurt me. You said you wouldn’t. I really believed that we were friends. That you wouldn’t just stop talking to me. I remember the disbelief and hurt I felt when I looked down at my screen and saw you hadn’t replied in three days, even though you read my message. Did I do something wrong? Do I say something? I know I’ve said I’m over it, but I’m not. How could I be? I completely trusted you at that point, and that was the point that you decided to back out. To shut me out completely. And you could say, “Well if you wanted, you could have messaged me and started a conversation.” But that’s just it. Why should I start the conversation? Friendships are supposed to be a two-way street, not just one person making the effort. Sometimes, I think you knew that was going to happen. Just things you said, things I didn’t pick up on. They were hints. And I didn’t realize until it was too late and you never answered me, and I realized you were done. I even sent you two more messages after that. One told you how I felt and I was so open and honest, and you ignored it. The second one simply said goodbye. I knew you weren’t answering me. And it hurts a lot. Even though it was a month ago. Even though you probably could care less. It fucking hurts Austin. It hurts to know that you didn’t and don’t care. At one moment, I hate you for doing this to me. On another, I miss you so much and wish that you would message me and say that you’re sorry and tell me why. And on another, I just want to message you and ask you why. I won’t though. I know that you never will answer me. you will never care. I miss you. I hate you. And it just kills me. it hurts a lot. You’re a jerk for doing this to me.

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