You have ruined me. I am incapable; I cannot adjust myself to social situations, I cannot simply ask someone to leave because of you. I am afraid to ask to do something else, something with more structure. I cannot be as bold as I once was because of you….
I was too polite. You would own my house proudly, while I hid in my dark shell, You would tell me “It’s fine just say and I will go” But when I asked you, a whole war would wage, you were so abusive, so mean, and the day I finally decide to tell you after all the hurt, after you using me;
To wash your clothes
To get a shower
To dry your clothes
To borrow money
To feed you
To use my internet…..After all as you said “It’s just what friends do” but we were past friends at that point. You cannot expect me to be happy when you go against simple human instinct. My mother was sick, lying in her bed, neither of us had money, she was in debt (-637), and you told me, she had spoke with you earlier and you could borrow that £50 to “sort yourself out” YOU LIED, YOU PHYSICALLY STOLE FROM MY MOTHER BY USING ME. That is disgusting, what kind of human being does that!?!?! What kind of sick twisted…I can’t even.
Yet we still would meet up, and talk about things.
The thing that gets me most is how violent you can be, how scary, yet you don’t realize, and now, with your new “friends” you paint me out to be some villain, cast down like Lucifer by your word. How am I the bad guy? Why do I care so much? I care because unlike you, every word lingers. When I met up with you to be the better person, I saw what you had wrote to them, you had made me out to be the biggest cunt. Fuck you. I came to make amends for feeling horrible about cutting you from my life, but nah, you had to make it all about you, poor old you. “Nobody likes me” You’re damn fucking right. “You’re too nice to me” You’re damn fucking right I am. I should have listened to the other family when they told me you were bad news! You don’t deserve the beautiful things in life. You don’t deserve your love, your family, your material things. Let us just remember, you, you drove me to this and no matter how bad you paint me, how disgusting you make my features, how lazy you make my body, just know, that your dark soul, your ever wrenching pain in someones head drove them to this. It is indefinitely your fault, and always will be.
and that Ladies and Gentlemen is why I cannot be happy. Bad things always happen to good people and good things happen to bad people.
I hope one day you crack your mask, and show them what a real monster you are.