• dlmd

    by  • April 22, 2014 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 8 Comments

    I know my actions made me a jackass. I’m sorry. I could never hate you or even think about fooling you. You are far too intelligent, for starters. I just need help from someone I can trust; someone who won’t just take it and run with it. I enjoyed our most-recent banter. You have a quick wit. But, that’s as far as things go which, I realize, is prfobably my fault. I admit that I had some things to work out first.

    8 Responses to dlmd

    1. onlooker
      April 23, 2014 at 6:44 am

      I guess my question here is: if you acted like a jackass, why would/should they help you? It’s one thing to still trust them because they never betrayed your trust. It’s a whole other matter to be nervy enough to ask for help from someone who can no longer possibly trust you. I apologize if this has nothing to do with your letter.

    2. author
      April 23, 2014 at 10:55 am

      @onlooker – No apology necessary. I appreciate the comment. I needed their help a while ago… before I acted like a jackass. But, my jackass behavior was in response to what I perceived as a slight from them. It’s silly, really, because I think were both people who guard themselves against manipulation. I also had my own issues with trust and began to “clam up” when they started grilling me about things. Have youb ever heard of professionals who get strung along with empty promises just so you can gleen their ideas from them? I was once in a similar situation. It’s not fun. I don’t think they would do this to me, but… We just were never able to move further on these topics. But they would chat with me all day long about personal things like family and such. What do I make of that?I think in my paranoia and stupidity, I neglected to see things clearly. Anyway, I will always be fond of them and don’t blame them if they think I’m a jackass.

    3. author
      April 23, 2014 at 10:58 am

      @onlooker – sorry, I meant to say “we’re both people…”

    4. author
      April 23, 2014 at 8:07 pm

      And it’s glean not gleen. I need to slow down.

    5. onlooker
      April 23, 2014 at 8:41 pm

      Well, to me if they shared their personal world with you that is pretty telling. I mean unless they were manipulative connivers that shows trust. That’s just my opinion though. Sometimes when you’re in a situation it’s hard to see the big picture. Especially when both people get stuck reacting to one another instead of acting. Just my two cents. Hope things improve for you. Good luck.

    6. tricia
      April 24, 2014 at 9:45 am

      If they chatted to you about personal things like family etc.. obviously they confided in you and TRUSTED you and valued your opinion or “guidance,” as far as advice goes. To think anything beyond that… or maybe how they approached you with their personal issues threw you off, looking at it in a negative light rather than, a positive affirmation, that they would seek your trust. maybe they saw an honest person in you.? Maybe you did miss the big picture. Whatever maybe, and even if it turned out you are a jackass 🙂 I hope you can at least make amends with this person and look at things , ” from every angle,” rather than just one-sided, because what you think you see, may not be the only way to view it. .

    7. author
      April 24, 2014 at 4:13 pm

      @onlooker – thanks. I hope that you also find improvement with any issues you may have. I think that your assessment of my situation is very precise and accurate. I have no reason to believe that they are conniving or manipulative. A face-to-face over coffee or a lunh-time walk would probably clear things up nicely. Good luck to you as well.

    8. author
      April 24, 2014 at 9:01 pm

      @tricia – Well, thanks for the positive spin and for giving me the benefit of the doubt. I’m afraid that after all is said, I was a Grade A Jackass. Jackass McDoucheypants. I should have my name changed. They weren’t getting too personal, but perhaps they were looking for help from me somehow. Or maybe they were just making conversation. I wish I could make amends but feel I’ve destroyed any hope. I wish you well.

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