• Dear k,

    by  • April 20, 2014 • * Safe for Work *, Thinking of you • 1 Comment

    Hey, you. Remember me? I’m thinking about you. You first. Like I always do. Just trying to understand what happened between us to make us feel so different now. And it makes me so upset because you meant something to me. Or at least I told myself you did. You made me forget about him, feel beautiful, feel wanted but most importantly needed. Like you needed me to make you happy. Because I was good at it. Was. All these thoughts go through my head, and you know I’m not good with words and talking. Because I get all choked up when you look at me with this face that I know will never understand how I feel, or how I think. You just don’t get it. And I don’t know how you don’t, it’s so simple. I want you and me. I want to work at it because “if it was easy everyone would do it.” Right? That’s what YOU always told me. I think you’ve lost sight of who I am to you. What I mean to you. And how bad you want this. Because you can’t even pretend anymore. Can’t pretend this is actually what you want. Because if it is,(which you know that it’s not but for some reason I’ll never understand you don’t want to say it) boy you sure do have a funny way of showing it. I don’t honestly know why you stick around with all the bullshit that you say to me. I think it’s because you’re lonely. You just need someone. And it sucks because you know how I feel about you, and that I really do care about you. You see it when you look at me. But you just won’t leave no matter how bad you know you want too. And even though I tell you to you know I’d never be the one to end it because I promised you I’d never give up on you ever. No matter how shitty you talk to me. Because I believed in you. I never doubted you. “Because doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.” Right? Like YOU always said. I meant everything I’ve ever said to you K. All of it. I just wish you’d open your eye’s and see what’s right in front of you. I know I’m not much. No super model. But I’m me. Which was good enough at one point. And I want all of you. As long as you want me. And here I am, typing some stupid letter to you on some website because I knew if I told you this I’d just get a blank stare and the same reaction I always do. And part of me wishes maybe you’d see this, even though you never will. Because I keep waiting for you to understand. Because that’s who I am. I won’t give up on you. Just to prove you wrong. To show you people do mean what they say. And then. Once we are over, you’ll look back and think ‘I remember that kel girl’ and you can just think about me for a while. Sincerely,
    that kel girl

    One Response to Dear k,

    1. Chord struck
      April 22, 2014 at 2:37 pm

      and it begins a nice melody.

      I do hope you know that you were so pretty to me, that you beat any supermodel in my eyes.
      It was a pleasant ‘look’ and you were one of a kind. How strange that I had a flashback out of nowhere,
      of a girl I was close to at age 23. I once stumbled across the word ‘Wifey’ (I believe it was a book title) while reading God knows what ??…in my peripheral line of vision.

      It seemed like it fit her, because she wasn’t close to a super model, but she had that look that I didn’t envision growing tired of….and I gave her the occasional, playful nickname “Wifey”

      To any woman reading, keep this in mind: Your humor, your personality, your ‘fun factor’ , your enjoyment to be around, your supportive nature, your acts of kindness, etc etc….will trump the ‘hottie’ almost every time. We live in a selfish world. So many women act entitled. Yes, men are visually stimulated by the size 3-5’s and we get involved with some of them, but it doesn’t take long to get fed up with ‘their act.’
      Some of us have learned our lesson and are beyond that phase. We’d take…and marry…a girl that has all the qualities described above.

      Don’t be intimidated by your ‘competition.’ Those kind are just a phase. The type a smart man will seek and become very attached to, is one who is exactly opposite of the ‘head turner.’

      In reality if your play it this way, trust me on this: You have the advantage. Women like ‘you’ are becoming a dying breed. There’s no need to worry. You will prevail.

      “Stay classy, San Diego”

      (My ‘buddy’ hails from that city.
      Catchy hook; his original song will appear (more enhanced) on their upcoming CD.
      Such a catchy hook; it’s a very beautiful song.
      It fits the post and all those reading with ‘old flames’ you might still have a chance to rekindle..

      That is my wish for all of you.


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