• I’m Not Okay

    by  • April 17, 2014 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 0 Comments

    I thought I was okay.
    But I’m not okay.

    Yes, I think I have changed some since I met you. But that’s not your fault. I’m doing all of the things that I’ve always wanted to do.
    But now I’ve changed, and I don’t know where to go. And all of a sudden I feel like I might be fighting depression again.

    I’m not okay. This is absolutely stupid. I shouldn’t feel this way. I should never, ever allow a man to make me feel this way. But I guess that’s what I get when I force an issue.
    It seemed as though you were sending mixed messages. But now I think it’s more clear. The fact that I have to initiate a lot of conversation in order to hear from you says a lot. I’m hurting myself. And I’m damn sick of it.

    I’ve already decided that we’re not going to be in a relationship. I’m just going to confirm that with you when I see you later.
    I don’t think I’m going to go to your house anymore. I don’t think we can play anymore. In fact, I think I’ll find someone else, or have that kind of playtime with someone I was previously intimate with.

    And I’m sure that you’re cool with that.

    But I need to be honest with myself.
    And I’m not okay.

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