You’re determined to let me know that your girlfriend doesn’t like me. And my telling you that I don’t care doesn’t seem to be breaking through. You live in a world of “why” and “how come”. So here you go:
First…she’s never met me. Never walked a mile in my shoes. Never laid eyes on me in real life. The only things she’s ever heard about me are your feelings, because you have a tendency to never discuss facts. Some people are like that. Not good or bad, just who you are. I’ve been trained for a long time to ignore prejudice (the judgement of someone without having met or dealt with them). I have a lifetime of people hating me for my skin, my gender, my ability to work in a male dominated industry (twice!). People want to hate me because I’m “uppity” and “proper”. I’ve learned to let opinions of me when you’ve never met me wash off. Who has time for that? So if she wants to meet me, THEN make a judgement on me, THEN maybe I’ll consider giving a damn. The problem is…
Second…She’s a brilliant woman with a promising future, and the only thing really standing in her way is you. She now has an intimate knowledge of alimony, child support, chlamydia, DUI convictions, eviction and foreclosure that you’ve given her in the last 2 years. Do you think she’d have to deal with any of that if it weren’t for you? Yet somehow she thinks you worthy of consideration for a lifelong partner. How am I supposed to respect the opinion of someone who’s decision making process turns you into a good guy. If THAT’S her idea of “people to like”, I would be perfectly happy being in the “I don’t like you” column.
By and large, I save my “caring what people think” to those people that I love and respect. My parents, my brother, my kids, a few close friends that have been with me so long that they’re family now, too. They have walked in my shoes with me. Called me out on my stupidity. Shared my joys. Commiserated my sorrows. Neither of you are in those ranks.
So share your opinions. Share her opinions. It’s your right as a human to let that be known. But, dude…it’s my right to not give a shit.