There needs to be recognition that something needs changing. Sounds redundant? Too simple? It’s so easy to get trapped into overthinking. “Why did this happen?”, “What’s wrong with ME?”, etc.
I believe sometimes feeling hurt is life’s way of screaming at you to do/try something different. I am also of the belief that sometimes we lose friendships and relationships for the same reason. Were you overly dependent on them for your self esteem? Did they take you for granted and you need to stand up for yourself?, etc.
These are just things I think about as I attempt to learn my own lessons on “why”.