• The things you won’t say

    by  • August 31, 2013 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 7 Comments

    are just eating me up inside. Why are you making this so hard? Just tell me how you really feel, the situation may become more difficult but at least well be in it together. You know just as well as I do, we would make it out okay.

    7 Responses to The things you won’t say

    1. D
      August 31, 2013 at 10:54 am

      Because he/she is unsure of how you feel about them? The same reason most of us are writing here.

    2. A stranger
      August 31, 2013 at 11:06 am

      1) Are you able to ask this of your person directly? Having just gone through this I can say it’s vital to have clear and honest communication if things are “complicated”.

      2) Make the other person feel at ease (safe) in order for them to share the info with you. Pressure, desperation, and demands will make them recoil. Any unease, insecurity, breach of trust will also stall needed communication.

      3)Find out what each other expects and wants = less likelyhood of disappointment.

      4)No mindgames period. Worst case scenerio you get hurt but at least you know you didn’t play games.

      5) Keeping the above in mind, really think about whether you can handle (physically do anything) about the info you receive from this person. It might feel great to know if your feelings are reciprocated, but does create additional external stressors. It can become an intense pressure cooker type scenerio and without strong foundation destroy what you already have.

      6) Good luck!

    3. @The Stranger
      September 1, 2013 at 1:22 am

      Gone back to this name again?

    4. One Stranger Says To Another
      September 1, 2013 at 8:21 am

      Perfect answer! Especially number 5, as that’s “fear” the self destruction from overthinking of what if’s of too many relationships.

    5. The stranger
      September 1, 2013 at 12:13 pm


    6. Author
      September 5, 2013 at 3:40 am

      Great advice, thank you. I have pushed this person so far away by pressuring them to tell me, I never even thought about the broken foundation piece. Funny enough thats the main issue in my current situation. I do hope I have enough courage to make changes soon.

    7. tricia
      September 5, 2013 at 10:26 am

      Never let fear be the reason you can’t pursue anything in life. its neighboring friend regret will shortly follow on behind.. Growing up my parents always told me, always ask questions. no question is ever stupid. Not ever knowing the answer to something is more painful then knowing..

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