• To the people talking to “themselves”

    by  • August 27, 2013 • To Everybody • 10 Comments

    Just hear me out please. I am just a spectator here. I mean that I am not involved with anyone who posts here. But I have been here long enough (I’m sure this applies to others as well) to see that some of you are making yourselves crazy. I’m not saying it as a put down. I’m saying that you are allowing yourself to be this way by engaging on this website.

    Some I know are thinking their person is here and in reality they are not. Others that may have a person here are still driving themselves crazy if their “back and forth” with their person is negative or ignored.
    How does acting bat shit crazy help ANYTHING? Newsflash! It doesn’t. It just makes things worse.

    My point is, you are NOT getting anywhere. You are prolonging your misery and stalling your healing. So therefore at some point you need to stop blaming others for whatever heinous thing they did to you (in your opinion) and start looking at yourself as to why you want to keep shooting yourself in the foot so to speak. YOU and only you are responsible for your own happiness. It is NOONE’S job to complete you.

    Just because you think they need to do ABC doesn’t mean they have to or should do it. Take responsibility for your own life. If someone has been in your eyes a narcissist or an asshole or bitch, then why do you want to keep speaking to them? Really? I’ve dealt with a narc. You are NEVER going to “one up” them or get them to see the error of their ways and become something they are not. They will continue to suck your power and you will continue to feel like shit. SO JUST STOP.

    If some guy used you, then learn a lesson from it. If some bitch is a whore, then be glad she’s not fucking with you anymore and is someone else’s problem now.

    When the shit hits the fan, there is nowhere else to go once it turns a corner and gets ugly like some of the stuff I’ve seen here. Get ahold of yourself. The only person you can control is yourself. Once you let go of what is making you “sick”, it will begin to get better. It’s the truth.

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    10 Responses to To the people talking to “themselves”

    1. S
      August 28, 2013 at 1:33 pm

      Just a question what does one do when they cannot figure out what is making them sick? What if its a collection of things, people, and situations? [I am not taking blame away from my self, but I have gown and continuously change or attempt to change my self both mentally and physically] And the shit storm follows-




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    2. Prime Time TV
      August 28, 2013 at 4:51 pm

      Do ABC?

      Hell, I was thinking more Dr. Phil

      Where there’s a hero
      You’ll find a villain
      It is a tried and tested most successful billing
      They’re in the kitchen
      They’re in the bedroom
      They bring the world inside the home
      They want to live in

      As we look inside their private lives
      It’s really me and you
      We’re watching on the tube
      In just one week
      You’ll be hooked so deep
      A dairy dose of soap on the screen

      This is prime time TV
      A real life drama

      As seen on prime time TV
      You can’t turn it off and walk away

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PELmP3Iw7mQ




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    3. author
      August 28, 2013 at 10:18 pm

      @S- I meant like if someone is obsessing too much over someone or something (like this site) and it’s stressing them out so much that they can’t see reality, then take a step back. That’s why in toxic relationships or just break-ups no contact is good because it takes away stressors. It’s like being here on earth – you can’t see the whole thing unless you are further away from it. If it’s a variety of things then can you take a day off and just do something silly that has nothing to so with all that you are dealing with? Can you get out of your house and just go somewhere new alone to get some peace? I have one of those brains that overthinks and never shuts off. I have to completely detach in order to regain a better perspective. Take care and good luck!




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    4. jo
      August 29, 2013 at 1:39 am

      Well, author, of course ultimately you are absolutely right and of course we all need to get a grip & move on. But this site is a free-for-all and the souls who inhabit it are all at different stages of their grieving and healing process. And different people take differing amounts of time to grieve and heal and do so in different ways. I don’t think it can be forced. Sometimes people do feel angry, sometimes they feel desparate – that’s how it goes. Speaking personally, I made myself break contatct with my person because I knew in my gut it was doing me no good, even though my heart wanted to continue to connect . LINS helped me a lot by allowing me to “speak” to them and let out my feelings while actually mantaining NC. As time has gone by this need has lessenened and I am more & more certain that i did the right thng. But in those early days I would read something which sounded like them and ( although I knew it wasn’t them) I would still respond. People do what they need to. I think we should give the “crazies” a break. Better we act out the crazy on here than in real ilfe where we could do ouselves and others much more damage.Best wishes.




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    5. Me73
      August 29, 2013 at 8:02 am

      you have no idea just how much this place curbs my crazy from being impossed upon the world of reality. so thank you very much but i shall do as i please until i feel i no longer need to. apparently you have yet to feel a love so strong it consumes you. good for you or on second thought maybe not.




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    6. Posted today, love M & E
      August 29, 2013 at 9:37 am

      today :

      I leave you with My vow to always love you as the father of our children and the lover of my heart I want you to be happy that is all that I have ever wanted you are my other half and I have felt so lost with out you I Love you I hope to see you friday.

      Have any more Bridges you’d like to sell?

      Irish, right?




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    7. author
      August 29, 2013 at 9:56 am

      @posted – I am NOT your person and you most definitely are not a father to my child.




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    8. author
      August 29, 2013 at 9:59 am

      @Me73 – you are the housewife in love with the lead singer of your fave band right? The one who thinks they are talking to you via their music? If so, then no, I have never been consumed by an illusion/delusion before.




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    9. Me73
      August 29, 2013 at 11:37 am

      @author

      absolutely – good recall,
      and
      deluded or not doesn’t mean the love I feel for him isn’t very real – as the heartache.




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    10. Shit Storm follows Lol
      August 29, 2013 at 11:38 am

      A. I knew one human being out of (est) 1500 I’ve met who ever used that word.

      B. In answer to your question, you list every SINGLE emotion you have about the situation
      (ex. Anger, disgust, betrayal, lied to, loved, embarrassed, feel like a nobody , etc}
      This is NOT to say any of these words apply to you.
      Just pointing out *every single emotion* you feel has to be expressed as remote as they may be
      . and NOT expressed to your loved one. It’s an exercise .

      example:
      So S. What makes you sick? List one event (per) Generally a person/place/thing/ anything
      What emotions do you feel when you think of this (one item/incident) ….list every possible one

      Keep doing it until the lightbulb goes off.
      You will experience a feeling of heaviness (real strong) if /when you hit the main one.
      When you then list/touch/allow to feel every single emotion associated with that, you will feel lighter when you hit the main one.

      When you hit a main one and then do the emotion side of it and hit the one emotion where you begin to feel lighter, stop.

      That’s how it works.




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