• Girlfriend-zoned

    by  • August 25, 2013 • * Safe for Work *, Disappointment • 3 Comments

    Dear You… and all the others,

    Why did you have to do that? Every single time I get close to a guy who I think is a great friend BAM there it is… Will you go out with me? Will you be my girlfriend? Can I kiss you? WHAT?!

    I don’t get it. Why can’t I just have friends that happen to be guys without it going THERE? Is it a crime to not want to have a boyfriend? I enjoy the company of guys my age but I DON’T want a relationship. I want a friend! Just because I’m nice to you and hang out with you does NOT mean I want to date you.

    I am not leading you on. I just want a friend and every single time I think I have one, the same thing happens. No matter how much I apologize and no matter nice I am about it, explaining that I don’t want a boyfriend, I lose you. You treat me like a girl that you went out with that you broke up with and when I try to keep things the way they were, it doesn’t work. It doesn’t matter how long we’ve been friends or how close we are. I lose. Why can’t we just be friends?

    I can’t take it anymore. I just want a friend that I can count on. I thought that was you. Apparently I was wrong… again.

    Sincerely,
    Your Ex Best Friend

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    3 Responses to Girlfriend-zoned

    1. @Author
      August 25, 2013 at 12:16 pm

      That’s because when you come to realise that ALL MEN who are single who spend time around you ALL have the same ulterior motive?

      WE want you & are falling for you- pure and simple. Any man who tells you this otherwise is lying to you-pure and simple. Yes they may say otherwise yet many will wait for eternity to get your clothes off for that one chance not realising it he has been friend zoned.

      Now there are exceptions…..? What, really you may say, other than men that are your girlfriends partner… the only way possible and this is extremely rare and hard for any normal guy to do and I do mean rare as a blue moon. A man has to look at them as a sister so we look at them if excited or horny & suddenly you visualise your sister-incest-yuck-disgusting…etc. That is the only way to friend zone a woman. Even gay men I have known over the years, this will surprise you as I worked at a large teaching hospital, if the woman is drop dead gorgeous they sometimes will sleep with that woman, she has to be absolutely steaming hot I was told on many occasions. SO even then you have to be aware so you see men want to talk to a woman because & every female will hate hearing this we want to sleep with you & SOW OUR SEEDS as we were & always have been programmed for ince the beginning of time. SO please don’t get upset that men were designed to be this way as otherwise we would be wo(men)




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    2. afemaleonguyfriends
      August 25, 2013 at 12:53 pm

      @author-I’m older now, but before I got married I idenified more with being “one of the guys” than having many female friends. Why? Because many of the females I knew were dramatic and every negative stereotype out there. I had a few close female friends, but that’s because they had a personality like mine. They were straight shooters, no games, non prissy types. Anyway, I guess I was fortunate because the close male friends I had were always good to me. They gave me advice; they were a shoulder to cry on and I reciprocated. And thank God, I never found out til years later when I didn’t talk to these friends as much that at some point most had wanted a relationship at one point or another during our friendship. I had no idea at the time. If I had known their true feelings at the time I would have felt weird and those friendships would have been lost. I was fortunate they were unselfish. So unless you are stringing them along, then it is not your fault. It is a compliment. But I know how it feels like maybe their friendship isn’t real if what they want is to get in your pants OR have a relationship that goes beyond platonic friendship. But they can’t help how they feel just as you can’t. A problem exists if their friendship is just a smoke screen for what they truely want with you. I guess it sounds weird to say I wish you a good male friend who doesn’t look at you as a potential partner, but LOL I guess that’s what you want right =o)? Good luck to you.




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    3. author
      August 25, 2013 at 3:06 pm

      @afemaleonguyfriends thank you. It helps to know I’m not alone. It’s so upsetting and frustrating. You would think I would be used to it by now since it’s been going on since 4th or 5th grade but I don’t think I ever will be. Your reasons are exactly the same as mine for who I hang out with. I don’t string them along, in fact I usually make a point of wearing baggy clothes and no makeup and my hair in a ponytail when I’m around them so that I don’t send the wrong message. I can’t get to a point where I feel like it’s a compliment because it hurts so much to lose a friend. Thank you for your kind words.
      @@author… well that’s just depressing. And by the way, I don’t friend zone any of them… I’m just not at a point in my life where I feel the need to be with anyone. I have too much else going on that I want to concentrate on. I’m sure I’ll feel differently when I’m a little older.




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