• The first stone

    by  • August 20, 2013 • * Safe for Work *, Confusion • 2 Comments

    Please see the world through my eyes just once
    Looking back on it that last I love you was like a punch
    With that look, those words, that feel I was again yours
    Driving fits of rage watching you hug tight
    What was I supposed to think this was all right
    That I could just brush it off my ego wouldn’t let history repeat itself
    You asked me once if I hated you, no and now I can’t remember if I kept that to myself
    Please enlighten me as too why I would just start a conversation
    I can tell you why I wouldn’t:
    Thoughts overpowering a conscious mind awakened to the fact of a self rebuttal
    Is it me, is it her.. I’m so stupid it’s not.. this is all a daily struggle
    So for once I think until I know I can’t just swallow my pride and dive
    I’ve blocked every emotion I’ve ever known out for years and now these sleeping giants are waking I just want to drive
    I want to get as far away from here as possible maybe one day it will happen
    Not in this way though not in this fashion
    These old demons they eat at me they tease me to thoughts of what once was
    I saw you I thought these were just my unrequited thoughts three clicks and away from oz
    And sadly all I could do was cower
    Now they whisper we’ve found her and this isn’t in your power
    All I’m asking is to treat me like a childhood toy
    Keep me forever or throw me away, Just don’t lead me astray
    and now I can’t get my mind off you again nothing works
    Hours of music and silence these used to be my perks
    I want to tell you I’m alone all week
    If you ever wanted to see me just show up or speak
    I’ll even leave a key doesn’t matter the time of day
    Just so I can really tell you what I want to say
    Audible words mean a lot more to me then keystrokes
    I don’t mean nor want to dwell on the past
    I just need you to understand why I’m scared to cast

    2 Responses to The first stone

    1. Naise
      August 20, 2013 at 2:48 pm

      This is beautiful. Many of us here have these stories, and for whatever reason we feel more comfortable coming to LINS and writing to the universe then maybe talking to the people we wrote such personal and deep feelings about here. Your letter resonates with me in many ways, but I do not let myself believe (as many others here have) that you are he, the one in my story. I do wish though, if this was how he was feeling he would communicate with me directly. What is stopping you author, if you don’t mind my asking, from reaching out to your person?

    2. Daphene
      September 13, 2013 at 9:24 pm

      I get it now. I truly get it <\3

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