• “lastnight”

    by  • June 2, 2013 • To You • 5 Comments

    Well, I don’t know what to say is my mind playing tricks on me or am I just so blinded by what I want to see that I don’t see the truth here.

    I’m not angry upset or anything it’s just the way i’m expressing myself because i’m so confused.

    I don’t know what to do I want to talk to you I want to ask you I want to know what is going on.
    But I don’t want to.

    My heart is telling me one thing and my head another I don’t know which to trust anymore do you realise that you’re even doing it or is there a reason behind it because if there is I sure would like to know.

    What is going on I really need to know.

    I guess i’m never really going to know because i’m never going to pluck up the courage to ask you.

    It’s got to the point where I can’t even talk to you on the phone anymore and that’s because of me I don’t know why but I just can’t I saw u ring me I had the phone in my hand I wanted to answer it and talk to you but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.

    I love you so fucking much and I can’t even talk to you so, Wtf is wrong with me too. I’m actually getting close to tears sat here writing this and I don’t even know why I can feel the lump building in my throat.

    God i’m just so fucked up in the head I try to act as normal as possible when I talk to you but if only you could see that my heart is breaking behind my words.

    I miss you

    yes I have been different with you but it’s only because that’s what I thought u wanted and now I just don’t know.

    And no i’m not saying you are fucking with my head but please just be honest with me I hate feeling like this and don’t hide away from this because even though you try to hide it it shows,

    I feel you, even though we are miles apart now it’s so strange it’s like we’re connected somehow and I know that just sounds weird but it’s true

    I love you.

    5 Responses to “lastnight”

    1. So fuckin strange
      June 2, 2013 at 6:58 pm

      because I called and they didnt answer. Even more strange is the whole time I am thinking if this is what they would be thinking.

    2. Is It Starting To Rain?
      June 3, 2013 at 9:43 am

      I shed a tear as I read your love letter as you words came from your loving soul. The tear became two, three………four………………..five

    3. Forever Connected
      June 3, 2013 at 10:04 am

      Once one’s pulsing heart is revealed to another their racing heart which beats to the same rhythm whilst syncing in time will last for eternity. Distance has no meaning nor does separation as once freely given they will always have a piece of our heart till the ends of time. I gave it whole heartedly.

    4. author
      June 4, 2013 at 3:32 am

      (@is it starting to rain) are you being sarcastic 🙁

    5. Dear Author
      June 4, 2013 at 11:34 am

      Dear author,

      No I wasn’t been sarcastic as I had a similar story where I saw my ex partner at her house only last Monday. To win her heart back to no avail(I knew deep down she had lost her love for me), & to be at peace or closure in a sense as she never gave me closure & I had to figure it out myself-that was her words….I’m no inexperienced male & that was truly soul crushing to have to endure that alone. I did it. I actually cried when I read your post as it touched my heart & the essence of my soul. A tear just cascaded down my cheek again. I still love her & always will. She was like no other. I have set her free as she wishes nothing to do with me. We all deserve to be happy & I only wish her the best just as I hope you are able to find what you are seeking? I humnly ask you for your own sake to find that courage deep down within you & go forth & ask that question of that person as it will set you free too, by giving you the answer you seek. It may not be the answer you like yet you will know you have done all in your heart & have been authentic in your actions. That alone will give you peace of mind?

      Shit, I need a tissue:) Be Brave!

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