• where to now?

    by  • December 21, 2012 • * Safe for Work *, God • 1 Comment

    Where do I even begin? Everything in my life has fallen apart and has only been getting worse for about a year now. The only person I haven’t lost is my love, without him i dont know where I would be. Wait, I know an mental hospital.

    My parents divorce and me getting distanced from God, my mom going to jail and being sunk so deeply in legal problems…my family falling apart and everything with it..has been bringing me down and down. I am so sick of living this way. I am mentally sick. I am lonely, depressed, angry, confused and frustrated. Im exhausted, I have ran for so long but I can’t run anymore. Im tired and I need to slow down, I want to change I am tired of being this angry bitch that screams at everyone and has a horrible attitude. God, you have some kind of nerve, like the Fray sings. Where are you? Im lost and insecure like the Fray sings..please dont wait..please dont be late..Im sick lonely tired and need you..Please have mercy of this wretch.

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    One Response to where to now?

    1. k
      December 21, 2012 at 12:43 pm

      Sometimes, it is in the lowest place that we realize just how much we need Him. Sometimes, the darkest hours can be the brightest. I cannot attest to experiencing anywhere near your hurt, but I have been lonely. Lonely among crowds of “friends,” so-called. And I have been hurt and aching for joy. I found that He was always there, and all i had to do was turn around and fall into His arms. He loves us. Just believe who you are–loved. Don’t try harder, do more, just believe that He is who He says He is and that you are His beloved child.



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