My Dearest Eric
Dinner was wonderful last night. Your choice in Wine is amazing 🙂 . I very nervous not knowing what to expect. Well I knew what to expect and YOU didn’t fail me or should I say or can I say US.?
My trust in people is very close to nothing even more so in men lately. YOU know that. However last during during dinner I made a choice to let go of myself and let YOU carry me for just a little. Eric do YOU know what that felt like? What it REALLY REALLY. Felt like? It felt so unbelievably amazing. So amazing it scared me and I clenched back up when I realize how you made me feel. I clenched back up because my brain told me stop he’s gonna hurt like many have before. What a pathetic thing to say! I pulled back as we both we’re ready to spill the beans. No pun intended :-). Eric I please understand I got scared. That dammm doubt! They say men clam up at the very slightest indication of LOVE and not being a man I still clam shut. I’m more afraid of loosing YOU than LOVING YOU. The only stake now is loosing each other. Would YOU agree? Another thing that was mentioned I am trying to understand. First if I gave YOU this impression I am sorry. Having sex with YOU just once is not gonna make me Happy. I don’t see YOU as a sex object. 🙂 SEX is so over rated! I prefer the deep intimacy we have shared over the last few months than a few hours of lustful desire. YOU do!n’t even have to touch me physically to make my insides tremble. Don’t miss understand me. As Biblical and morally wrong as it would be I would take the chance and “BE ONE” with you IF and when the chance the Universe would give us.
Eric I hope that one day we could put distrust aside. That everything that rip people apart like anger, jealousy, hate and everything I didn’t mention bring us together. Because yes I see every once awhile things about you that make me feel this way. WHY? Because I am. In LOVE with YOU and LOVE you deeply. I HOPE as I pour out my Heart here YOU don’t hurt it and run away. Yes we both realize and see the unfairness to others and we cheat ourselves time and time and again. May we find a way to over come some how this unfairness. May we listen to what the Universe, the Angels and our Hearts tell us. Oh wait YOU will never read this.
We should do Breakfast next year. As 2013 brings much LOVE for us.