Things aren’t quite what they used to be, are they? We’re still in the same boat, but the atmosphere is different. We still love each other…but WE’RE different.
Ever since you told me the first time that you wanted to go back to being just friends, I’ve felt as if we lost something. You were my first love and my first broken heart, maybe that’s why it hurt so much, and maybe my heart’s still mending. You’ve made up for it and I know we’re okay now, but I’m still scared everyday of losing you. You found yourself a pretty little girl that was your “one true love you loved The Most” for a while, even after telling me you couldn’t deal with love at the time; I wasn’t good enough then, why should I be now? I’m nothing special anyways, just that quirky, quiet girl that used to be your best friend.
And know you say I still am, but am I? It doesn’t feel like it. You hardly talk to me anymore, only when I start the conversation first. When we do talk it’s always the same, how-are-you’s and how-was-your-day’s and I-have-to-go-I-love-you’s but it all feels so empty. In person it’s different and you put in a little more effort, say how much you want to be with me but why can’t you show it? Why did you never even apologize for all those times you hurt me? Don’t you see how much it has?
And yet, I still love you, more than anything. I still miss you and think of you everyday. So tell me love, what am I supposed to do? When will things be how they used to?
Sincerely, nostalgically, and dejectedly,
-Paige, the girl that was once your everything