Sometimes I regret parting ways. I often wonder what my life would be like if you were still in it. I miss you, but it’s not painful anymore. Sometimes I think that one day we will randomly reunite. Maybe one of us will let our curiosity grow stronger than our logic, or maybe that’s just me trying to feel better about the fact I chose to walk away from you.
Walking away was the only thing I could think to do that would stop me from falling into the same trap that i’d lived in for all those years. I had to stop the cycle of pain. I loved you far more than I should, and you loved me far less than you’d care to admit. In the end, we were both too stubborn to change our ways.
For many years I believed that in the end you’d come around. You’d wake up one day and see that I was the woman you were meant to be with. The girl you lost your virginity to would be the same girl who you’d walk down the aisle. But of course, that is just fairytale logic. I’m not sure if I was ever what you really needed.
Now, I don’t think of you much. My life is full of many things: School, work, love, family, friends, etc. When I do think of you, it comes to me softly, like a whisper, and I wonder how you are doing. I wonder if your life is treating you well. I wonder if you think of me too. Then the softness is gone, and I go one with my day. I wish you well john.
Who knows. Maybe we’ll see each other again some day.