Four months, yep that is how long it has been since we have had a face to face conversation. Four months ago I said that I could not keep our friendship going because it was going to hurt me way too much, it still hurt like shit. (sorry for the swear word but it was needed) Leaving you behind was the hardest fucking decision that I have ever had to make. You made me feel like I was better person. You made me believe in myself. But, I left you because I could not spread my wings with you holding me back. You wouldn’t have held me back if you would have given me a commitment, but you wouldn’t give me a commitment, instead you walked away. Who knows, maybe you really never thought about it, I just don’t see how you didn’t. I wish I really knew what went on inside your head so that I could just tell you exactly what I want to say.
No matter what may have happened four months ago it is time to meet up again, so here I go back to real life contact with you and I’m scared out of my damn mind. You make my heart beat faster, my mouth get dry, and my palms sweat. Its disgusting how much I want to know if you feel the same way. You said that you wanted to meet up too so here we go. I want to be your friend, but can I handle it? We will soon find out.