I broke the connection, not the bond
by admin • August 2, 2012 • * Safe for Work *, Acceptance • 24 Comments
Unexpectedly and entirely by accident I came across an article you wrote. It knocked the wind out of me, seeing your name and recognizing the style of your literary voice.
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The universe is unfair. We were so perfectly suited to each other that it actually became a very scary thought. We spend our lives searching for that perfect love and I’m moving on knowing it was right in front of me but just beyond my reach.
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You mustn’t forget that you’ll always be with me. I made the choice to break our connection and I have to live with that, but nothing will ever break our bond.
Was the article on this site? If it was, all I can say is wow…
J?
That would knock the wind out of me too….
I live for those types of connections. They are very, very rare
Maybe one day, it will come back again- It’s true , the universe is seemingly unfair but sometimes, it works in loves favor.
Never say never.
I wish so bad that this was the thought going through the head of my “one that got away”. I more than anything want to have that connection back. It really was perfect.
Maybe not. Maybe the bond was always there to see how far you’d reach and failing to fulfill what’s supposed to be will break this bond just as well? Who knows? And who really knows the reasons of what’s behind the unexplainable? not I, that’s for sure, and merely musing one too many times about things I may never find an answer to. Like: Is anything really out of our reach or is it us, ourselves merely holding us back to actually reach out, extend to grab this hand we long to hold? Fear, maybe? I don’t know. To let go of something you find to be your ‘perfect love’, for any reason, is something I am simply unable to understand. BUT that’s just me, of course. good luck on your ways without it and the regret that ultimately will linger within.
@Maybe, just because you don’t understand something doesn’t mean it ceases to exist for someone else. I wasn’t there to know what went on between these people and why they were out of each other’s reach and neither were you, I’m sure. So you’d be well suited not to tell someone else what they’re feeling and the repercussions of such. How tacky.
To M: I’m sorry, I’m not J.
Maybe it’s tacky to criticize musing maybe’s with male-comprehension of those musings? A question mark insinuates a question and not a fact. Forgive me for assuming common sense to see the difference, I should know better
If you aren’t J, who are you?
Dear Author,
hmmm… what type of literary piece was it?
The wind was knocked out of you? Swallow hard here.
Explain.
Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. Equally tacky.
To break such a connection is so painful…like a part of you has been ripped out.
Colin?
A.G. – It’s a pleasure seeing a response from you. It’s good to see a fellow twin still haunts this site. :O)
M – I’m a J, but I conjecture that you’re not my M and I’m not your J. How delightful would that irony be, though?
To the Author, I can only ask: why? If you cherish that bond, why sever the connection? The pangs from that, alone, where down upon that bond, with each day that passes… The spiritual pain (if you’ll grant me the illusory license to call it that) is insurmountable.
I guess, what I’m really trying to say is that I don’t want the answer to ‘why’. I’m saying go and reconnect. Fix the receiver[s], fine tune the frequency so that you’re on the same carrier wavelength. Do something. Anything.
Fight for it, if it was special or meant anything to you, at all…
(Sorry, I’ll get off my soapbox, now.)
Gemini,
I’m on here and about about once a week or so. Sometimes not only under A.G, but I’m around…Power twins, activate! haha If you know that one, well- I’ve just aged myself. If not, there is always the internet for research.hahaha…
But seriously, I really appreciated this letter from author. I can certainly relate and have personally experienced the element of such surprise within accidental circumstances- strange and mind blowing encounters like that will knock you off your very foundation.
Author,
If there is a way, maybe you could at least respond to the article and see what happens. I am assuming it was online, so usually there is a place to do that- try reconnecting. Even it’s just to say hello and that you appreciated the article or felt compelled by this literary voice.
Step 1. – Reconnect- try it. You only get one life. Take a chance. Finding the article in the first place could be the first element of a romantic journey that you might just let pass you by. Maybe your first encounter was nothing more than “bad timing”. How will you know if you don’t try?
I have learned this much thus far in my life :Sometimes the hardest part of love is simply having the strength to believe in it.
Gemini is right, If it were special in any way, let your heart fix the damn receiver and fine tune that thing before you lose the ability to hear or see anything at all.haha…. I can call a repairman for you if you like.. I shall will you all the strength to do it.
M, You and your J serve as pretty think irony from this end too. You have no idea… It’s funny how a few letters make us wish it were the person we wanted it to be. I wish you both the very best. Good luck to you too!
Another Gemini
Author,
I don’t mean to harp, and if it seems like I am, that is the antithesis of my intention.
I found these words on the instawebz, the other day. They are not mine; however, they resound the gravity of our reality [read: realities].
“…I had lost, time. I was losing time and I knew that it would never come back. Not to me, a lonely speck. In it’s place, only a memory that once was as real as the thump of my heart, bouncing against that wall of life. If only I could stop it, or even just steady it’s pace. No, it’s gone. The time will never come back.”
I wish you the best of luck, dear Author.
A.G. – In the form of “anonymous responders”! :O) I can relate, too, but that’s – perchance – why I’m so adamant about the author making an attempt, at the very least.
Gemini, thank you for your words of advice. They’re very strong and valuable.
It’s not that we don’t want to be in contact, its just too hard on both of us. We can’t be together (and I mean can’t, unless you overthrow two governments so all of those happy phrases like “nothing is impossible” don’t apply to us). And for years we attempted the loving, supportive best friend role but it’s impossible to find someone to share your life with when you’re hung up on someone you can never have. It became too painful to listen to tales of each other’s love lives and be supportive when we both wished we were the focus of one another’s affections.
I chose to write a letter I’ll never send instead of contacting them. My hope is that they’ve met someone incredible that they just can’t live without. I don’t want my presence or memory to derail any potential happiness they might be experiencing.
Gemini,
haha… “In the form of :suckers for a happy ending”!
I know is that if this scenario happened to me, I would want to know, or that I at least tried.
There are no regrets if you try.
The romantic heart is not as forgiving to oneself in that aspect, I have found- but that could just be my opinion.
I can’t live with all of those “what if’s” anymore. Life is too short. I may not always get it right, but I try to put it out there when it’s special to me even if I fall flat on my face. Believe me, I’ve certainly shared some quality time with the pavement through the years.
I do however make sure to get up again if I fail or get hurt. It is very rare for me to put my true heart out there in the first place of course , but when I do- it’s worth it.
So, we are curious Author, did you do it?
Do I need to hire professional cheerleaders? haha..
With all respect,
AG
Sorry to hear that author.
I’m all about overthrowing those governments for the shear act of doing it, but you have made your decision on this and it’s respectful.
It sounds very complicated and heartbreaking to know that if this person is your true love- it can never be. : (
Take Care,
AG
My dear Author,
I can understand and even empathize with your position, as I’m still “hung up”, myself. I am stuck in this static state… It’s like the song lyrics: “Look in your eyes: I’ve never seen the ocean, not like this one…”
I wish you the best of luck, but I can – definitively – warn you that this road is an arduous one and it’s full of pangs.
I would rather die, than live through this asymptomatic suffering.
Just saying. :O)
Ah, AG, form of suckers for happy ending[s] couldn’t be closer to the truth, eh?
Sorry for the brevity, I feel a bit exposed/revealed, but my previous disenchanting discourse.
Always,
Gemini
Thank you again, G and AG (incidentally, I’m a “twin” as well. Perhaps I’ll utilize the moniker Yet Another Gemini
), for your advice and for sharing your personal feelings.
It IS hard, and I know it will continue to be. But I love this person and want only the best for them and what’s best for them isn’t me. I’ll just continue writing letters I’ll never send and pray for their happiness.
All the best.
G,
That song is quite good. Simple, yet elegant.
Those feelings do go deep. We all share them I suppose. I live a few miles from one of the most beautiful coastlines. I see it everyday. As enchanting as that is; I would give this location up in a heartbeat just to be able to look into those eyes again…I really would.
You can see eternity there. It’s magnificent!
Take Care,
AG
To you two governments, to me but one man’s choice. My heartfelt sentiments are with you..I can relay, somehow.
T?