That’s what kills me. Everything that I can’t tell you, and for such stupid reasons it would seem. I guess I should start by saying I’m so glad that we’re trying again, and I keep kicking myself for those couple months we lost in between. But now we only have so long before I leave, and I don’t know what to do.

I know commitment scares the hell out of you, that’s why I haven’t pushed it as hard as I’d have liked to, but I still don’t understand it. I mean, isn’t it every young guy’s dream to just get together with a beautiful and amazing girl when and not have any strings when it’s over? Not mine, apparently.

And that’s the point, we both say we don’t believe in love, not truly, but I don’t think either of us believe each other. And I’m confused with myself; for having no commitment, why do you mean so much to me? And why can I not stand the thought of leaving you in only a couple short months? But in the end, what is there to do?