Someday these words will come together — they’ll twist and bend and weave in a mosaic collage exploding with color and character. They will drip with pain, flash with joy, fade with resignation, and scream with determination as we carefully assimilate our exchange of pages. Each day adds a new layer to our understanding in the way each year brings a new ring to a tree, never ceasing to grow in wonder and beauty. You, never ceasing to grow in wonder and beauty.
Uncertainty is a part of life, but that is why we must never remain indecisive when we do not know what lies ahead. Rather, we must act; we must decide to pursue one direction without complete illumination because otherwise we’ll remain in the same dark cave. The light is ever moving forward, and if we do not follow just because we know not where it leads, we will be left behind to stumble in the dark.
And uncertainty is certainly present in my considerations of you, you amazing person. Prudence is wise but caution is limited by requirement of risks, without which we could never truly live. And you, sweetheart, are certainly worth the risk, no matter what the situation dictates. I want to feel your soul brush up against my heart, gently wrap its ethereal form around the pulsing organ and fill the spaces with light and warmth after every breathing beat.
I am crazy, you see, and this you’ll discover more by the day with each conversation we hold. My eyes have seen your real time smile but once, through the lens of a screen, yet even that was enough to send sparks flying into a dry hay field. I have another lens, however, through which I never get to miss a smile of yours, because it is truly that intoxicating.
You know I’m leaving soon, but for some reason you relish the challenges that distance may create. It is ironic, is it not? For in reality, the miles will fade away by the hundreds, but I will be much less accessible than I am right now. After those two months however, we may finally be brought together face to face, if only for a short time. For me, it will be enough.
Then, who knows what sort of distance, or lackthereof, will stand between us? Six years is a long time, but I will certainly have plenty more opportunities behold your beautiful smile and weird personality in reality. Well, maybe not “plenty”, but far more than what is available to me right now. Though I am sure we will make good use of hanging out with our only barrier being that familiar screen.
So take care, my dear, and may God bless you generously, for this road we both appear to have chosen will not be easy by any stretch of the imagination. But we will fight, never giving up, and someday we will discover that all the blood, sweat, and tears were worth the years we’ve spent apart, because they will be multiplied in the time we will finally have together.