• Merely Hopes And Dreams

    by  • June 7, 2012 • Help • 0 Comments

    I literally want to scream in your faces right now. You saw my cuts and scars. Even the guidance counselor called you about their concern about me. What did you do? You just yelled at me for doing this for attention. That it was just a fad that I would get over. That my friends told me to do this.

    You KNOW my friends would never tell me to do something about it. If anything, they were devastated, and were ALL willing to help me, which is more than what you would EVER do for me. I can only talk to them. You always tell me I can trust you with things I need to talk about, but you always judge me. I can’t trust family. You guys lie to me, go behind my back, and disown me for the dumbest reasons. You never believe me, and no matter what I do, you guys don’t accept me.

    You think that i’m some sort of rebel for creating seperate email accounts and creating a facebook. All of that was done so I can talk to my friends when I need them the most. But since you blocked all of those websites, I have no connections with anybody now. I can’t see my friends, talk to them, any of that. I tried sending them letters, but you read what I wrote them, and told me I needed to stop with this ‘friendship bullsh!t’, and that I needed to get over myself.

    Please, i’m breaking. I’m dying inside. I am so close to running away, I already have my things packed up. Oh, and you said you would send me to Boys Town if I ran away? Ha. Like that’s gonna work. I am going to run far, far away. And even if I get caught, Boystown is better than living here. I get up in the morning, eat breakfast alone, go volunteer in silence, sit by myself in a gym full of kids my age that won’t talk to me, go home and sit in my room and cry, eat dinner, and cry myself to sleep. I can’t take this anymore. I’m sorry.
    I’m done.

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