Well. Only a little bit more school left, and then my junior year is over.
I don’t know what exactly happened, but this year has been so terrible.
I was sick for so long.
He started drinking and smoking (which breaks my heart).
School is hard.
I’ve been so stressed.
And then there are the “friends”.
I really am beginning to wonder if there is just something wrong with me that makes people want to not stay with me. I honestly am not sure what I did at this point. But is it really my fault that C started being so terrible to me all the time? That K stopped paying any attention to me? That nobody else gives a shit?
I am lonely and struggling to trust other people.
I hate spending my days doing the same thing over and over and over again and never knowing if anyone is even going to bother talking to me.
I’m scared, because the past few months are kind of a blur for me. I honestly don’t remember much. It was just routine.
I’m scared because of how thin I’m getting. I still think I’m fat but I feel empty and weak and not good.
I just want to feel better.
I need to feel better.
I don’t want to be alone.
I just want people to care about me.
Please let this summer and senior year be better.