It just sort of happened all of the sudden. One day I thought of you as just a great friend and the next I was having these feeling for you. But you’ll probably never know and it will probably never happen..
You would never guess that I have feeling for you from the stupid things I have been doing. Only I could be so stupid, or so nice I guess. I’m just here to please everyone. I’m a big pushover and I will do anything to make my friends happy. And If you knew what was going through my head, you would tell me that I didn’t need to do what I was doing, but I just can’t say no.
I really want you to be happy and I can tell you really like her. She’s my friend so I want her to be happy also. Even if she already has a boyfriend who she LOVES.. She can’t help that she also has fallen for your charming personality and cute smile. I mean its just a harmless crush..or at least that’s what i’m trying to tell myself.
I think what gets me the most is that she is or already has taken you away from me. For a while there we were talking everyday and telling each other goodnight. 🙂 You were filling that void I have in my life and making me happy. I’m just so comfortable around you because we can talk about nothing for hours. Now when we talk it’s usually me counseling you about her.
I have this feeling in my gut that she is going to hurt you. She might not mean to, but it’s going to happen because she LOVES her BOYFRIEND. I know you’re smart, but whenever I try to be real with you it’s like it goes in one ear and out the other. I know you would like her and her boyfriend to break up so you can have her, but that’s not going to happen. She is just leading you on and playing with your head.
I guess If she does hurt you it will be partially my fault because i’m helping push you two together. At first I didn’t have these feeling for you and she really did just have a slight, harmless crush on you, so I didn’t think what I was doing mattered. Now I’m realizing that it does. When she was getting jealous at the campfire, I made it so she ended up siting by you. When it was time to go to bed, I Pushed for you to sleep in our tent (But only because I thought I could be one of the two people that slept next to you..boy was I wrong.) The last and biggest mistake I made was to give her your number. I was in the middle of a shower, when she text me. She asked if it would be weird if I gave her your number so she could, “Thank you.” My head said YES IT WOULD, SO NO YOU CAN’T HAVE IT, but my hands typed: no, i’ll give it to you.
Why am I so good at setting my TAKEN friends with someone (who I like), but I can’t set my SINGLE self up?!?!? When I ran into her yesterday, she just giggled about the situation. She knows that what she’s doing might be wrong, but she’s not worried about hurting you. Her boyfriend would not like this situation. Not one bit. But don’t worry, I won’t tell him because I’m too damn nice.
I’m just tired of being a “good friend” to all you guys. I need a man in my life, especially since all of my girls have one. They are always texting them, and going on dates with them, and even complaining in front of me when, ” he hasn’t text me in an hour.” They need to step into my shoes and see that they have it good.
Well, I guess all I can really do right now is support you and make sure she doesn’t hurt you too bad. I’m here for you whenever you need me, even to talk about her some more. I wish I could do more, but you know me..I’m too shy to speak up..
If only you knew how I felt,
Your good friend M.