My friends have asked me in the past why I don’t believe in God. I keep having to tell them that’s not true. I believe in a god, just not the christian God. I cannot bring myself to believe in a just and loving god. Not after the last few years.
My mother gets MS, and cancer… My grandpa gets cancer, has to get a pace maker and half of a leg replaced… My grandmother had to have a hip replaced… My aunt had to have a tumor removed… My uncle lost his youngest daughter to SIDS… I lost my father to a heart attack… And now both of my closest friends also have cancer…
I can understand hardship to test people… But this is too much, all within the last two years.
I can’t say that I’m depressed, or suicidal or attempting to harm myself, I just don’t know what to do. How do I start to cope with all this, when anyone I would turn to for support is slipping away?