• You broke it

    by  • March 10, 2012 • * Safe for Work *, Abuse • 0 Comments

    Years, I spent years letting you tear me down to a level of low I didn’t know existed. I realize now you were trying to bring me down to how you felt. Your physical, emotional, mental violence was never about me and what I did wrong, it was about you and how you felt about yourself. I left you a year ago and I took our son and ran far far away, but some days I still feel bad for you, some days I want to think you could change, I grew up and grew past that.

    I gave you so many chances, I picked you up off the floor more times than I can count. I defended you against everyone who told me to leave you. I fought for you. Then you had the nerve to attack me in front of our child, and expect me not to leave you. My son will never be you, my son will never put his hands on a woman in anger, my son will never call a woman the names you called me. I have done everything to make sure he grows up to be four times the man you are. Getting sole custody was easy, and I don’t know if you purposefully got yourself arrested to make it easy for me or if you really are stupid enough to violate court orders multiple times and expect not to get caught.

    I really do hope you find the peace you need in life, and you get the help you so clearly need for all the inner demons you are fighting. But you need to understand that I can’t let you fight those demons around our son. I know you love him, but if you can put your hands on me when I was pregnant I don’t believe you can keep your hands off of a rowdy toddler when you are angry.

    I will always keep you in my prayers, but please, please, stay away from us and let us start new.

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