Your hand brushed across my forehead, down my cheek. My has heart never beat so quickly or loudly in my life. You pause at my neck and ask if you can touch it- to an outsider, it may seem bizarre, but you know me so well. I trust you completely. I trust you not to do what he did to me that night.
As your fingers graze my neck so gently, the contrast seems impossible. His fingers had wrapped around the same spot so tightly only six months before and yet you’re so loving and careful. I’m shaking as you lift my head up, and as I look into your eyes, you slowly bridge the distance between us. When your lips finally met mine, I feel a spark, a jolt of electricity, the knowledge that I’m completely in love with you.
Our lips move against each other and our tongues meet for the first time- I can’t help but be amazed at how different this is from the last time I was kissed. You’re moving slowly, teasing me; he forced his tongue down my throat before forcing himself on me. I trust you.
You gently touch my neck again, as though you’re trying to take away all of the pain he inflicted on me. You whisper my name, a sound I could listen to over and over again. I love the way the syllables roll off your tongue and create a beautiful symphony. I love the way your eyes light up and sparkle when you talk about your passions. I love the tingling sensation rushing through my skin as we stand in your room, fingers intertwined, lips locked together for the first time.
I would do anything to be able to relive that moment, and yet I wish I could remove it from my memory. The moment I fell in love with you was the very moment our friendship was destroyed beyond repair. We haven’t spoken since that night. You took my pain away and replaced it with trust and love, only to tear that away from me and double my pain.
In a way, what he did to me wasn’t nearly as bad as what you did to me. I hate him.
I love you; I trust you.