It’s been six years since I first met you. The truth is that all the admiration, the respect, the unknown chemical bond that connected me to you, well I finally realized after all these years that I had fallen in love with you deeply. You finally wrote back to me.
The truth is that it will always be you. It won’t be anybody else. I’m in love with you and I care about you more than you’ll ever understand. The hard part is not knowing on your end. You never said what my heart was longing to hear. You thought all of this was recent, but it has just taken this long to figure it out that I’ve been in love with you from the beginning.
You thought I made a choice about something else that will make me happy. The truth is it will never make me happy, and today I step down from it. I can’t lie to myself and live with what I’ve been going through in the past. You know that. If you are happy where you are at right now then I am happy for you. I would never take you away from that.
But a part of me thinks you are just doing all of this because you do really care and you think are doing what is best for me. But all it’s really doing is tearing me apart. All I really want is for you to know that I love you (even though you know that I care) and to tell me if you do that you love me too.
What I wrote before about trying again with this other person is not going to happen. I won’t tell you that though. You’ve been in a relationship for many years but I’m dreading that this year will be the year that you propose and I’ll spend the rest of my life without you.
If you love me please let me know. I’m too weak to ask…obviously since this site is the only place that I can truly express how I feel.