• We’re “just friends”

    by  • March 5, 2012 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 0 Comments

    Oh hai there, my FRIEND.
    Yeah, you. The one who we all know likes me, the one that we all know I like. You, with the red hair, the most amazing smile, a laugh that could cheer up the world. You, with freckles everywhere, but the most beautiful ones being on your shoulders and back of your neck. Yeah, you who says your fat but you’re really not.
    You’re amazing, no matter what you say. You’re a great guy not matter how horrible you think you are. You say you’re tough, you act tough, but you’re a softy. And that’s okay.
    I like that guy.
    I also like the guy that’s rough.
    I like the guy that’s giddy and happy and can’t control it.
    I like the guy who has emotions and cares.
    I like the guy who has a girlfriend
    I like the guy who wishes he didn’t and wants to be with me.
    I like you.
    Every side, all sides.
    And that’s what is making our being friends so hard to me.
    I like you. A lot. And to be just friends, fully knowing that I want to be with you, and you still hinting, showing and acting but just not saying that you want to be with me makes it so hard.
    I could be friends. I know I could. But it would mean leaving EVERYTHING behind. All feelings would go. And they wouldn’t come back.
    But you keep giving me hope for someday. And that’s okay, someday will come and probably go and we’ll both be living our lives happily.

    But you shouldn’t let love pass you by if it’s standing right in front of you.
    You shouldn’t be living your life in fear of being alone, but rather living your life by the moment so you’re happy.

    You can’t live your life trying to please others, cause if you aren’t happy there will always be some person (in this case, me) who isn’t happy.

    I am happy, I’ve figured out how to be happy. Now it’s your turn.

    I just, I don’t know if I can be friends with you. It tears me apart to hang out with you. knowing what I know about how you feel and how I feel and not being able to be natural. it’s like I’m lying to everyone and to myself.
    But I do it in hopes that someday, that someday, you’ll realize what you want. I want to help you along the way. No matter what. But it’s just so hard and I’m torn as to what I should and want to do.

    But no matter what. I will never forget you, I will always wonder what you’re up to. I will always care and I will always be here. No matter how hard it is for me.

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