i tried to kill myself thursday night.. a day after my 16th birthday.. i downed all of my medication which really should have killed me.. i don’t know why it didn’t.. i woke up from being passed out for 7 hours puking what i believe to be blood and couldn’t walk for 2 days.. apparently it’s been obvious to you guys that i haven’t been okay because i got spammed with calls and texts from people i haven’t talked to in god knows how long.. saying things like “well you weren’t at school today and i know you’ve been really depressed.. just wondering if you’re okay..” etc. .. if it was obvious why didn’t you guys talk to me before?..
i’m going to go to school tomorrow i hope.. and see if anyone says anything.. i don’t want to be known as that freak who attempted suicide but failed.. i really do have amazing friends.. i shouldn’t try to blame this on you. don’t blame it on you either okay? you guys deserve a better me. i’m sorry for this.. for everything..
if i really do survive everything i’m putting myself through and don’t die.. i promise i will become a better person.. or at least clean myself up.. maybe try to get some help. i love you guys.. thanks for never giving up on me.