• My Silent Words

    by  • March 3, 2012 • Abuse • 0 Comments

    Sumtimes I feel like no one can hear when I call out to them for help. Sometimes it feels like no one cares. No one listens to my stories anyway. When I was little I had to keep my month shut and wasn’t aloud to say anything and if I did. . .big mistake. Here’s to my real mom:

    Dear whoreface
    Its not that I don’t want to talk to u….
    It’s that u don’t make an effort to talk to me.
    Ur my birth mom ur suppose to try to talk to me even if I don’t sumtimes pick up. Ur the adult make the effort to talk to ur daughter. I’m only 16 I shouldn’t be the one always reaching out to talk to u madre. Again I’m only 16 and ur how old?! Ya u should already no u should make an effort. Ur not 5. It’s not that I don’t want u in my life…. It’s just u don’t try to be in mine. Even tho I didn’t say much  when I lived u u tryed to be in my life. Now dat I’ve moved I’ve nvr once recieved a phone call from u (minus my bday and if I called u and left u message) that was just u attempting to care and see how I was. Sorry I assumed u cared. Its not that i dont believe what u say…its just u Try to tell it “ur way” . I no u hate my dad and my stepmom but they never did anything to u. U talked crap about them (mostly daddy) and tryin to brainwash me into thinkin he doesn’t love me and he does drugs. NEWS FLASH!!!!!!! My dad does love me and taryn and meghan and he does NOT do drugs. And he NEVER says anything bad about u ever. all I ever heard from u growing up was how bad my dad was. What I believe is my dad and My stepmom are great and kind people. Please grow up and stop bad mouthing them.  Try to set an example for ur kids…..(TOO LATE!!) Btw when I asked daddy to send my grades to you it was because I was proud of myself. I don’t get why you took him sending them to you as negative thing.  A decent response would be, “Wow, my middle kid. I am so proud of you.” Instead, you used it as another opportunity to demonstrate your lack of maturity through irrational and childish! behavior. Also, don’t pat yourself on the back too much. It has been my hard work and dedication that achieved those grades, which is a sheer miracle given that I was raised by a mother who has always been more concerned about which guy she’s going to screw. Also i did not appreacite u not allowin me to go to my dad ad lauries wedding. It’s not that I don’t respect u…it’s just theres certain boundaries in a house wit kids in it. Growin up there are a few things besides u verbally abusing me, that r inappropriate for kids. ONE having sex in the house while ur kids are home….GROSS AND NOT RIGHT!!!! TWO leaving ur kids home alone while ur out all night and screwing another guy….still gross. THREE cuss mema out of the house…she was just tryin to help. Next time pull the stick out of ur butt. By doin that it shows us that we hav a right to cuss u out in the future. FOUR gettin drunk at home wit ur current at the time boyfriend. I dont need to see u get beat up or see u both fighting or hearin u hav sex upstairs…..THATS JACKED UP!!!!! FIVE the ties attached to ur bed are vry inappropriate. I don’t need to no that when u bang u and or bf tied each other up. LASTLY SIX ur drawer of inappropriate electronics. Dildos and vagal cream of urs in a drawer… Uh It’s nasty and  it smells. Not appropriate to have in da house in ur bedroom by ur bed. BTW find a better hidin spot for that seriously and don’t forget to sanitize the drawer even tho the smell most likely won’t go away……It’s not that I hate u and want nuthin to do wit u…it’s that uve said to me and done things that hurt me and caused me pain. I understand that bein a parent can be hard sumtimes but that doesnt give u the right to verbally abuse ur kid(me). I nvr appreciated u callin me a bitch, low life, lazy, threatening to end my life bc u “brought me into this world and” u “can take u out,” good for nuthin little brat, whore, incapable of doin anything right, worthless piece of shiz, never good enough for anything, mean b*tch, let down to evryone, no one evr likes me or wants to be my friend no guy will evr like me and other hurtful words and things u said to me. Your wisdom is a beacon of light in my dark and irresponsible world. Without your incredible attention to detail and sincere thoughtfulness, this bit of information may have been overlooked, Thank u for making me worthless in your eyes and make me feel absolutely horrible about myself and fricken hitting me. I expesically loved it when u said u rather hav anyone else as a child then me(like Ozzy) and when u said u don’t love me or want me as a daughter and kicked me out of the house. Now u can see y I don’t and never really tried to talk to u. Ur lucky that wit a birth mom like u I did not end up in sum crack house in Phoenix workin on gettin my 3rd abortion or worse. 

    Yur piece of shit fricken worthless kid.

    I don’t know what I did to deserve this and sometimes it’s way too much. I feel like no one can my cry. I use to hid in my closest just so she wouldn’t come. In and scream/hit me. Her words made me realize why no one cares and why I’m so f**k up and How could anyone want to talk or be or laugh or hang or ever love me when I’m such a worthless piece of crap…..

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