• Great White Buffalo…

    by  • March 1, 2012 • Moving On • 0 Comments

    Dear Ex,

    You know I still care for you… I wouldn’t still be around if I didn’t.

    But you really need to back off!
    No, I won’t take my top off for you anymore. I will never give you another blow job. I don’t want to get back with you!

    You’re having problems with your girlfriend… you come to me all the time, telling me how awful she is, how you don’t want to be with her.
    Well then, break up with her.
    It’s as simple as that!

    But don’t lead her on, while telling me that you “think we could have worked out”, and that you’d “like to try it again”.
    Don’t ask me behind closed doors if I’d want to get back together with you, don’t assume you have me wrapped around your finger. That puppy-dog look never worked, it’s not cute. I always felt obligated to give in to you.

    I told you I don’t want to get back with you. I told you my reasoning was that I’m happy right now. What you don’t know, is I wasn’t happy before.

    What I don’t have the heart to tell you, is…
    I hated your cockiness, you are no better than the people you put down. You aren’t as handsome as you think you are, you aren’t as smart as you act.
    You abused me emotionally for years, and I am so unbelievably glad to have gotten out of that! I didn’t feel safe… I didn’t feel comfortable around you. I felt like I was walking on eggshells, all the time. If I said one thing wrong, you would throw a fit.

    And this is what would hurt you the most. I *hated* sex with you. You are so selfish!!! It was all about getting you off, it was all about you. From anal to oral, I offered it all… but I never even came close to ending satisfied. I was bored during it all. Bored and in pain most of the time.

    I will never go back to you, to that. I will never again stay with someone that doesn’t care about my feelings, I will not settle for someone that doesn’t try to satisfy me.

    What you don’t know, what you won’t know, is that my current “unofficial” relationship is more satisfying (physically AND emotionally) than what we had for years. I feel safer in his arms than I ever have with you, and we’ve only been “together” for a few weeks (and even though I’ve been too shy to accept it thus far, he has tried on multiple occasions to go down on *me*! That’s such a nice change from you).

    So please, stop telling me that you miss me. Stop looking for ways out of the awful relationship you’re in now, stop looking for an easy fuck in me. You won’t get it. I gave you years to prove yourself, but you blew it.

    I’m too good for you…! I didn’t believe it before, but I know it now.
    Grow up, sweetheart. I’m not yours anymore, nor will I be again.

    Good luck searching, good luck moving on.
    I have.

    Your Great White Buffalo.

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