I’m at the point of trying to move on. I thought I needed you in my life, even in the most superficial of ways. I feel like I’ve been tied to you since we met, but I need to let go. This is only achievable by forgiving myself for past mistakes and by forgiving you for the mistakes you made.
I thought, when I initially contacted you after our three year silence, that I needed to offer that apology right to you but now I know that’s not true. Contacting you again after all that time brought me down so low. It made me miss you so much. It made me analyze something in the past that I could not change, and it made me view myself as a bad person in the whole situation. I am not a bad person. I was just young, and I made some rotten mistakes that hurt you and hurt my now hubby, and hurt me most of all.
I hope you think of me fondly, and I hope you still have love for me. I will always have love for you, but I need to be able to think of you as in the past. I need to walk on with my life and focus on the here and now. I need to say goodbye to you and the hope of you.
So goodbye. I’m sorry about how things turned out, and I really wish we could be friends but it is just too painful for me right now. I hope you will understand.