• so call me maybe :)

    by  • February 22, 2012 • * Safe for Work *, Forgiveness • 0 Comments

    Dear Previous Crushes,

    A) Thank you for support. Even though we will never discuss it, you helped me develop a sense of balance, confidence, and perseverance. You helped me feel like I was noticed in a time where I felt deeply unappreciated, and felt hopeless. Even though you might never know, I am fortunate that I felt some connection or bond during such a strenuous time in my life with someone. Although the acknowledgement was minuscule, the reason I liked you, or possibly loved, was because I felt some type of communication between us. So thank you.

    B) Thank you for not acknowledging me more than you did. This helped me develop better, healthier relationships with people in the future. Because you had some characteristics that I felt were good qualities, I was able to distinguish who was there for me and who wasn’t. Part of me felt at first that I wasn’t friend material to you, but now I realize that although you might not address me fully, that I deserved more acknowledgment from future people and endeavors.

    C)Thank you for leading your own life and acknowledging that I am leading my own life too. I always had that sense of security when I was talking to you and now because we have gone separate ways, I have grown so much. I am in a relationship that I built with mutual attraction and likeness. Now I know what it is like to be loved and appreciated beyond social cliques.

    D) Thank you for rejecting me. In fact, I am genuinely relieved that I was rejected. Although part of me is attracted to you and your personality, I have gained confidence in taking risks. Also by removing myself from you, I was able, once in college, to create my own identity that was apart from the melodrama of high school. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to be rejected.

    E) Thank you for helping me move forward. Because of you and solely you, I was able to see beyond the romantic side. You wanted to be seen as more than superficial, as do I. Sure do I wish we had a better connection, or even an actual one? Do I feel hurt and embarrassed? Of course. Sometimes when I see you, I tend to ignore you…and for that I am sorry. The reasons aren’t because of you. It is because I can’t look back, or I will get stuck indefinitely.

    and lastly,

    F) If you ever need a friend, KNOW there was someone who once thought the world of you, and still feels a connection. But most importantly, know that I am happy and hope you’re happy too and that you marry someone and become successful. You deserve it. And SO DO I!

    🙂

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