• Release Me, Love

    by  • February 22, 2012 • Depression • 0 Comments

    Please, please get out of my life.
    Let me go.

    I’ve turned crazy and it’s all your fault.
    I’m so so tired but you’re still keeping me awake.

    And nothing fits inside me anymore. It’s like you begged me to swallow you, in all your insanity. But I wasn’t hungry, not even slightly… and now I’m so full of you.

    And now?
    Now I just want to hurt you.
    Someone once told me that I was a good person, because when I’m annoyed at someone I don’t get really angry – I am never violent. I am not a violent person. I don’t know who this person was… maybe a friend, or maybe someone in my dreams.

    I want to hurt you. I want to punch you in the face, or in the ribs, so that you may feel half the pain you’ve caused us all. I want you to hurt like I’m hurting now.

    Then, in my world, you won’t even count anymore. I won’t need to care for you, all will be complete. You will not matter. You just fail. You won’t mean anything to me.

    I want you to feel a pain that I can relate to, not simply the pain of your existence. I know that it is hard for you. You let me into your head, and I feel the sadness inside you. I have been dragged into your mind, to battle all this depression with you.
    But I can’t do it any longer.
    It is too deep, and too ugly. And I receive nothing in return.
    Not your love,
    Not your friendship,
    Not anything but repeated stabs in the back,

    Sort yourself out and I won’t have to keep trying to save you. I’m crying, but you’re not even worth my tears.

    Release me from this mindf***ing grasp you hold me in.
    just let me go.

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