February 20, 2012
I know there is a lot weighing you down. Perhaps things have not gone the way you wanted, or intended, or dreamed. I dive into my mind sometimes and imagine a world where your problems are non-existent and if I could, you know I would fix everything that bothers you. I would fix everything just to see you smile in relief. But, I can’t. I am of no help. If anything I bet I am one of those problems in your life. I tug at your sleeve asking for some piece of you, but there is nothing to give. I am sorry. I am sorry that I want so much. I am sorry that I have lied. I am sorry for my flaws. There is something between us that I think is very special. But right now, at this moment, there is a risk that that “special” thing, whatever it may be, is going to die. And it will be because of me, because I insist on wanting you now. Not later when you can actually possibly, perhaps maybe, give me something. I just want you to know that I will probably stubbornly hang onto my feelings for you. But you must carry on, as you so diligently do. I’ll be okay. I promise.
Come back to me if ever you want to. Find me some day.