It’s okay. Someday…maybe not now I’ll find a man that will fight for me and we will appreciate and respect each other deeply. You obviously didn’t want to.
He’ll love his work. I’ll love his work. But he will never love his work more than me. I’ll love my work. He’ll love my work. But I will never love my work more than him.
We will sit and drink coffee together and watch the news. We will go camping out underneath the stars, and rock climb and plan our own routes. We’ll argue about who forgot to put the toothpaste cap on last. He’ll take me to see an amazing concert and I’ll sit across from him and let my eyes glow. He will see and smile. I will make him birthday cakes and put his favorite frosting on. He will laugh when I do a little dance for him.
We’ll hang out with our friends and play pool. We’ll do donuts in the empty grocery parking lot during the winter time. We’ll turn up the music driving down the highway. I’ll sing at the top of my lungs. He will join with me.
I’ll remind him to tuck in his shirt. He’ll remind me to visit the post office. We’ll talk about having a boy. We’ll make names for a girl. He’ll hold me when I’m depressed. I’ll kiss him to show that he is my best.
He’ll think of a surprise. I’ll feel like the luckiest woman in the world. I’ll get annoyed. He’ll say stuff he didn’t mean. We’ll fight and bicker. We’ll make up. We’ll make love. He will look into my eyes and say,
“I love you”
and I will look at him and say,
“I love you too”
We’ll build our log home and raise a family. There will be photos on the fireplace. Shoes blocking the front door. There will be laughter and screaming. There will be breakfast times and late nights. Little heads will bop up and down below the counter tops. Their names will ring in our ears and remind us that we are a family.
Someday you will realize that this could have been us. Someday you will realize what you lost. Someday you will see us and know for sure….
That this is what you missed out on.
This is my future. I just wish I could have spent it with you.