I betrayed you.
I let the evils in my life affect us and end us.
I left you to die and still turned my head.
I’m so stupid.
You were the one, my one.
You were my first true love, the one to save me every time I was drowning in my pool of abuse, the first person to share my life with and threw even more miraculous events we had a beautiful baby girl 2 weeks before christmas and was the happiest I’ve EVER felt in my life.
(my life will be explained in another letter)
No matter how much they damaged me, you still love me and I don’t know why.
I don’t deserve it.
Your gave me all your love and I all I gave you was goodbye.
It will never be the same, you’ll never love me the same, never look at me the same way or treat me the same way.
And I’ll always feel worthless in your eyes for not realizing that you were so good for me.
I tried to replace you thinking that there was someone better out there like mother always said.
I went and looked and every guy made me want to run and scream, some of them did.
Every last one of them made me feel so low and unloved.
It made me realize that what I had with you was never gonna be again and I’ll never get it back.
Like a puppet on strings, I was manipulated to leave you by my own mother.
To what mother, would it seem right to try to end a true love relationship and make her daughter miserable.
I can’t replace the six months we spent apart
Or how to even make it up to you.
I just hope you stay by my side so I can fix me and messed up head so then
We can move onto working on us.
Cause I’ll never let this go as long as we are connected through her.
I betrayed you.