• I hate you sometimes.

    by  • February 6, 2012 • Hatred, Love - Pure and Simple • 5 Comments

    I can’t sleep.
    I’m sick-
    Sick to my stomach,
    Sick in the head.
    I’m not right.
    I’m angry.
    I’m crazy tonight.
    I’m lonely.
    I’m missing you.
    I’m sad.
    I’m hurting-
    I’m STILL hurting.
    Do you hear me?
    I hate you.
    I love you.
    I hate you more.
    I want to kill you.
    I want to hurt you.
    I want to tear you down.
    I want to build you back up.
    I want you kiss every inch of you.
    I want to apologize.
    I want you to hit me.
    I want you to tear me down.
    I want you to tell me how ugly i am.
    I want to make up.
    I want you to apologize.
    I want to make love to you.
    I want to fight afterwards-
    Then make love again.
    I’d rather be forever fucked up, with you,
    Than nothing without you.

    Can’t you see how crazy this love is?
    Why do we keep doing this?
    I hate you sometimes, but I love you a whole lot more.

    5 Responses to I hate you sometimes.

    1. same
      February 6, 2012 at 11:22 am

      with the exception of the killing, i went through all the other emotions! love can be insanity; i’m slowly regaining my calm but i pray to never feel the same way about anybody again, not worth it!

    2. kay
      February 6, 2012 at 1:26 pm

      this is exactly how i feel for the guy i like.
      some days i think it will be better when i leave this place, but then i realize i’d rather a life with him then without.

    3. coffee
      February 6, 2012 at 4:19 pm

      Why don’t you tell the person how your feeling?

    4. Ann
      February 6, 2012 at 10:32 pm

      I have felt this way… Do feel this way. It has been 4 years and because of the uncertainty of the relationship and not knowing what will set him off, I am scared every single day about why he hasn’t called. Every time I text him, I sit filled with anxiety, about whether not he will text me back. If he doesn’t, is he mad at me again? Did I do or say something that made him angry? I shouldn’t be wondering this about someone who I have been with so long and who swears he loves me.

      I love him more than anything, but there is this other I guy I am tempted to be with, just so I no longer have to wonder what tomorrow will bring.

      I wish peace for myself and everyone else out there!

    5. OP
      February 12, 2012 at 4:18 am

      I have told him, several times. It gets me no where, nothing has changed, nothing will change. This is about my abuser,who I happen to be in love with. after not speaking to him for almost a year, after ignoring several messages and calls from him, I finally caved and broke my no contact order. This feeling is crazy. How can someone make me feel so good and so miserable at the same time? He’s toxic but at times I feel like I need him. …Woe is me. I hope I’ll get this crazy life right, one day.

    Leave a Reply