I miss you so much. I can see now all the wrongs I did. I just wish you would talk to me. I want to be with you. I can’t imagine my life without you. Please. Please, give me just one more chance. I never took our other counseling sessions seriously. I just took it for granted that you would always be here for me. I am so incredibly sorry. I can’t begin to tell you how much I love you! WHY do we not appreciate what we have until it’s gone? I can’t stay here. I’m going to start packing the house tomorrow. Tonight. I can’t sleep anyway. You’re all I think about. Everytime I didn’t listen to you haunts me. Every time I pushed you away eats at me. Everytime I just ignored you is killing me. I can’t take it! You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I can’t lose you! I’d rather lose everyone else in my life and have you!
I know I sound pathetic. I don’t want to be the needy girl who just pushes you away even further. If I don’t get these words out of me I’ll say the wrong thing to you and maybe you’ll be gone forever. You are my world! I know I haven’t been there for you. I am changing me. I’m getting away from all the distractions around me so I can concentrate on my family. My family of 6. Just us. I’d rather live in Timbuktu with you than anywhere else. I’ll go where ever you want. I just want you!
Lord, please soften his heart towards me! Please let him listen to me with an open mind. Please. Please help me to be a better wife. Please help me to focus on him first. If he were to give me another chance, please don’t ever let me forget how much it hurts right now thinking I’ve lost him forever. Let me cherish him and love him the way he deserves to be loved. Lord, please. I know you will do what is best for me and the kids. But if I can’t be with him, please bring me home to you! I can’t imagine being happy without him. He truly is the love of my life. I need him! But your will be done, Lord. I will follow you.