Dear stoner assholes currently sitting in my living room.
You are friends and family of my boyfriend of 4 years. At one point, I thought we were friends. Currently? I hate you all and have minimal if any respect left for you. I allow you to sit in MY house, play xbox in my house, smoke dope (regardless if you’re legal, it still bugs the fuck out of me), and I get nothing out of it. We do not talk, we do not hang out. You come here, you get stoned, you eat all of my food, TWO 24 packs of soda is gone in 3 days. HOW DO YOU DO THAT? You rack up my electric bill, you leave trash everywhere, and you don’t even have the manners to THANK ME for once. Today was the last straw. Before I left for school (full time Criminal Justice student), I spent over an hour washing dishes. I had to hand wash ALL of my expensive wine glasses, because you were too lazy to wash out a normal dish. So instead I had to wash my expensive glasses, which I am now one short because one of you jerks broke one, and threw it away and couldn’t even tell me you broke my fricken expensive glass.
Dear lovely boyfriend,
I know you practically live here. BUT. You do not pay any bills. You have no job. And all the money you come across goes straight to your green card purposes. You also aren’t in school. While I am away, since you are living FOR FREE, contribute, please, before I blow a gasket. You sit here with your stupid friends all day long. I took out 4 bags of trash today that you said you would take out “later”, 5 days ago. I left the pot you cooked out of in the sink, soaking, because I am nice. Today I only asked one thing from you – wash out ONE pot. I got home from 4 hours of class tonight, to find the pot still in the sink. When I badgered you about it (in front of your friends), you said “Ok”. I have been home for 3 hours, the pot is still dirty.
I told you 3 days ago I needed a break from your goon squad, and you acknowledged that. I did not say I want an “us” day sometime in the next month. I need a break before I bust their stupid bongs over their more stupid heads.
After all of this. I desperately need a break from your friends. To the point where I repeated myself tonight, in front of your friends – making me look like an asshole. But you aren’t doing anything to help…maybe when they all go, you should go too. Your lack of care towards my feelings is making me just as upset with you.
I feel like I am losing my mind.
This is what I’ve typed up to post in my house…I just don’t know how else to handle this.
YOUR MOTHER DOES NOT WORK HERE;
PICK UP AFTER YOURSELVES
Rinse the dishes and cups that you use and put them in the dishwasher.
If you are not capable of doing this simple task, you don’t need to use them
BEFORE YOU LEAVE, make sure ALL of your mess is taken care of.
The trash can is not far away, use it.
I am not a cook or a personal restaurant. I won’t make your dinner, and I can’t afford to feed you.
If you feel the need for drinks and munchies, bring your own – you are allowed to cook it here.
I deal with all of you smoking in my house – legal or not.
I am tired of dope in every room of my house, and leaving ashes in/on my bathroom sink is rude.
Clean up your mess when you’re done or you won’t have the privilege of smoking here.
Every time I have to pick up your trash, hand wash your dirty dishes, or spend at least an hour scrubbing resin off of my floor, I lose some respect for you. If I have less respect for you, I will have less patience with your messes.
If you actually took the time to read all of these and thought for one second that I am a total bitch for enforcing rules in my home, that’s fine. I am a bitch, I am rude, and I am human.
But I am not your mother.