I kind of want to leave it there, maybe add a nice slap to the face (and thanks to a few friends I’ve learned hot to correctly slap :P) but I have so much more to say. How could you ask me to date you for the second time then just leave me and expect me to be ok? How can you tell me you see us together for a very long time, then dump me the next day? How can you tell me I wasn’t “physical enough” when I told you straight up that I would not fuck you unless you became my husband? I loved…love you. You were…are my first love. I can not change that, this kills me. I always thought I did not deserve you but in reality, you do not deserve me. I stick to my guns.
In my mind I will never be good enough for you…however years from now when I am called “doctor” and you’re God knows where, you will regret this. Your “mature mind” can go find the next slut of the month. Oh, yeah, and FYI you remember my ex? Yeah, the one you hate? He flirted with me almost every day, I told him to stop. He never did. Ironically, he “semi-got over me”..until earlier this week…haha right before you broke up with me…I am not sure I could ever go back to him but he loves me for who I am, all the time. He loves me in my sweats. With my hair up. When I am about to cry. He loves my sense of humor. He loves my hair colors. He loves my style. He does not mind my psycho family. He apologizes when he lies to me. He apologizes when he fucks up. I know you are some of those things but you will not let me inside to find the rest. You never gave me the chance we need.
Wow. Rereading this, I realize this sounds semi bipolar. However, I’m pissed. I’m sad. I’m happy. I’m hurt. I’m scared. I’m scarred. I’m a mess. I’m crying. You have broken me again, congrats. You deserve an award…I hope you are happy now…