We had a retreat last weekend where we did an activity. The woman leading it was a hypnotherapist and told us to envision our perfect day. You know, it’s weird what happens when you let your mind wander, and even when you try to steer it in a certain direction, it keeps circling back to the same thing. It sucks to recognize that some feelings, those feelings you want to pretend you’re over or realistic enough to disregard, the ones that you are too embarrassed to say out loud, wander in. Like that dream job you’re too scared to hope for because you don’t think your smart enough. Or that guy you should really be over, but you apparently your not. Hate that. It’s funny, thinking back on it a week later, because an much as I’d love to pretend that it isn’t actually how I feel, deep down I know it is. Sure, everyday life I’m not pining over those things, but somewhere it my head it hurts to hope, because realistically, I know they’re more likely to get farther away and not closer. But for now, I can only continue to take control of my situation, push forward and affect the things that are in my control. Study harder. Accept the past and meet new people. Stay strong and don’t be afraid to take risks.